Rowen's Phobia
by LadyHawk225
Summary: A short, humorous, fic about a little...problem...Rowen has. Purely humorous! Enjoy! Please R & R!


Author's Note: I own nothing here. I don't know if this is an actual phobia, but I am in no way trying to make fun of or degrade anyone with any type of phobia. This is fiction. Please R & R!

Rowen's Phobia

By: LadyHawk225

"Guys! Time for dinner!" Cye called through the kitchen door.

The sound of running feet and loud thumps could be heard from upstairs as Kento and Ryo came down the stairs and into the dining room where Cye was just putting his famous beef and peppers stir fry on the table.

"Where are Rowen and Sage?" Cye asked.

"We're right here, Cye." Rowen answered coming in the back door.

"We were getting a little extra training in before dinner. Sorry about the sweat." Sage added as they all sat down to the meal.

"That's okay," Cye eyed Rowen and Sage's damp shirts and foreheads. "Let's eat."

The sound of chopsticks and eating were heard throughout the dining room as the five Ronin's ate in silence. Suddenly, Sage looked up from his plate to see Rowen nonchalantly moving the salt and pepper shakers across the table. He watched as Rowen heaved a frustrated sigh (which went unnoticed by the others) and grabbed the milk, moving the carton so that it was directly between his and Ryo's plates. Rowen stared at the milk carton for a while and then moved it slightly to the left. Then he smiled and went back to eating.

"Uh, Ro."

Rowen looked up from his plate to Sage, the other guys looked up from their plates too.

"What was that for?" Sage asked, confused.

Rowen looked confused as well, until Sage indicated the milk carton and salt and pepper shakers. Then he turned beat red and mumbled, "Nothing."

"Yes it was something, Ro. What's wrong? Why are you acting so strange?" Sage pressed. Although he knew Rowen liked his privacy, his curiosity was just too much for him.

"I said it was nothing." Rowen grumbled, going back to his food.

"Dude, what's up? Did you suddenly start a hobby in rearranging condiments?" Kento commented earning snickers from Ryo and Cye.

Rowen looked up angrily from his plate. "NO! It just..." Rowen looked suddenly sheepish.

"What, Ro? Common you can tell us." Sage coaxed, glaring at Ryo, Cye and Kento who continued to chuckle.

Rowen looked at Sage and then down at his plate. "I—I...I have a phobia of crumpled up paper napkins." Rowen looked up at Sage's surprised face.

"WHAT?!?" All four Ronins said as one.

"Yeah..." Rowen added. "Crumpled up paper napkins bother me. I can't stand to look at them, especially not when I'm eating."

The other guys all look at Rowen incredulously, and then over at Ryo's plate, where his napkin was lying, crumpled up into a little ball next to his plate.

"It drives me crazy." Rowen said, staring at Ryo's napkin with a deranged look in his eye. "Crumpled up paper napkins, especially when your eating, and...and that paper that they put on the outside of straws, like the kind you get at restaurants." Rowen looked at the other guys for confirmation. Sage nodded and he continued. "They...they look so thin and crumpily and little pieces sometimes come off the end and they fall on the floor and you step on them." Rowen was now shaking and the other guys had moved just a little ways away from him, around to the other side of the table. "Yeah...and...and sometimes you spill a little water on them and then they get wet, and they rip into LITTLE TINY SHREADS, AND THEIR SO WHITE AND CRUMPILY AND THEN YOU STEP ON THEM AND THEY STICK TO YOUR SHOE AND THEY FOLLOW YOU!!! GODS, THEY FOLLOW YOU!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!" Rowen screamed as he ran shrieking from the room. The guys heard him tear upstairs and slam the door to his bedroom.

"Oh...my...word." Ryo breathed once they heard Rowen slam his door.

The guys all looked at each other and then back at Ryo's napkin, and they burst into laughter. They laughed and laughed until tears ran from their eyes, and Kento actually fell off his chair. When their mirth had subsided and Kento had regained his chair, Sage wiped the tears from his eyes and looked seriously at the group.

"You know...hee hee...this isn't really...hee hee...funny. He was dead serious and I think a little crazy." Sage said as his laughter faded.

"Yeah, you're right, but what are we supposed to do about it?" Cye asked taking a sip of water.

"Who knows? But we should probably try to help him." Ryo commented.

"I know! I have a plan, he'll either have a nervous breakdown or he'll get over his phobia........" Sage said.

The Next Day

Rowen slowly opened his eyes and stretched his limbs. He groggily looked over to his clock and read, 2:30 PM.

"Well, time to get up." Rowen said out loud as he sat up in bed. He looked down to his lap. Their were crumpled up paper napkins all over his room and his bed. His eyes grew wide and he clamped his hands to the side of his head and shrieked for all he was worth.

Out in the woods, the four other Ronin's heard Rowen's shriek and looked up from the books they were all reading.

"So, he has finally woken up." Sage said as the shrieking continued to ring through the forest surrounding the manor. "Good thing Mia's gone for the weekend."

"Yeah, looks like the plan is going fine so far, I just hope it works." Ryo said staring off in the direction of the screams.

Back in his room, Rowen, still shrieking, ran from his bedroom and into the bathroom where he got himself a cup of water and promptly poured it over his head.

"Wake up Rowen, wake up!!!" He cried. Suddenly, he felt a presence in the room. He slowly turned around, and saw. The entire bathroom was covered in crumpled up paper napkins.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Rowen now hysterical, shrieked again as he ran from the bathroom and down the stairs. He paused in the living room. The entire place was covered in crumpled up paper napkins. He screamed again and ran for the front door. Locked. He cried and beat the door with his fists in fear and frustration and ran for the kitchen. Crumpled up paper napkins. Crumpled up paper napkins were everywhere. Rowen screamed and made a mad dash for the back door. Locked again! He turned to the left. Crumpled up paper napkins. He turned to the right. Crumpled up paper napkins. And he did the only thing he could think of to release himself from his living hell. He fainted.

The guys were chuckling to themselves as they walked back to the manor, five hours later.

"Well, looks like it worked. I haven't heard him scream in hours." Kento said as they approached the house.

The guys unlocked the front door and walked in.

"Roooowwwweeeennnn!!!" Sage called entering in living room. The guys were a bit puzzled as they began picking up the napkins they had placed all over the living room.

"Rowen? ROWEN!" Sage cried as he entered the kitchen. The other guys entered the kitchen in time to see Sage gently slapping the face of the unconscious Rowen who lay sprawled out on the floor by the back door.

Rowen slowly opened his eyes to and saw Sage kneeling over him, a smile on his face. Rowen sighed in relief.

"Oh, Sage, thank God it was all a dream! I dreamt that their were crumpled up paper napkins all over the place and the house was locked and...and..." Rowen looked at the room still covered in paper napkins.

Sage barely had time to cover his ears before Rowen let loose a crazed shriek of terror. "AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! They followed me! I told you they would follow me! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!" Rowen's shrieking and rambling turned into wild maniacal laughter as he curled up into a tight ball and began rocking back and forth, shaking his head wildly and laughing. Sage watched Rowen's eyes fly all over the room as he laughed and rocked and he turned to the other three Ronin's in the room.

"Oops."

OWARI


End file.
